This past Saturday I took the team to another rural tournament that was held at..., yep Buick Arena. I can't believe I keep driving out to the sticks where I lived for two years and moved into town to escape. Life is funny that way.
Anyway, the players on my team were showing a lack of motivation in wanting to acquire the puck from the other team. So, I dipped into my coach's bag of inspirational comments and pulled out a gem. I told the kids that they had to want the puck badly. I told them to pretend that they were starving and the puck was a pork chop. I know, I know. Regardless, the was a moment of quiet on the bench and then I hear a little voice say, "I like pork chops. They're my favourite food." This led on to a bit of a conversation on the bench about how good pork chops were. Clearly, this was not one of my highlights of coaching.
On a similar, but completely different note, I had a weird situation at my hockey game the next day. I was in the shower and had just finished rinsing off. The fellow at the shower next to me had just finished as well. I was following him to the exit. That was when he stopped to talk to the guy in the shower next to the exit.
The problem was that the fellow had stopped right in the middle of the exit. I quickly sized up the space left between that fellow's butt and the edge of the door frame. That was a no go. So, I was there I stood soaking wet and getting colder by the minute. Females will ask why I didn't just go around. I had to think about that too. I knew I wasn't going to squeeze by, but only on a gut level. Later while thinking about it, I realized that it is against the guy code to let any part of your naked body touch another guy's naked body. I did not want to be the guy to cross that line. The guy code is unwritten and we never talk about it, but it is rigid and every guy knows it. Only a few social retards don't and that's a very big reason they are social outcasts and pushed to the edge of the herd for the predators to take first.
So, there are my random hockey thoughts.
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