Calcutta of the North

 We decided to make the two hour trek to Grande Prairie, Alberta to do some shopping.  Grande Prairie is the closest city of any size and if you want to buy anything that is not available at Wal-Mart, then you have to go to GP.

While driving I was reminded of what an adventure driving up here can be.  I have driven in most of the major cities in Canada and have ridden buses in China and Korea (both notorious for their bad drivers).  I must say that the driving habits of the average driver in the Peace Region is the worst I have witnessed.  Drivers up here are a menace to themselves and everyone else on the road.  Selfishness is mostly to blame. 

The road between FSJ and GP is mostly a two lane highway and people do not like to wait for an appropriate place to pass.  I normally have to hit the brakes and/or pull onto the shoulder to avoid a head-on collision by a vehicle passing on a hill, over double yellow lines or where there is not enough space.

I remember reading an article in the local paper that said the accident rate in this area was about the same as many third world countries.  We pay the same premium as those in Vancouver, even though we live in a small town.

For a two hour drive, it is the most tiring I have ever done.  You have to be on you toes all of the time.  You are never sure if some slack jawed mouth breather in a giant pick-up truck is going to decide that you will get out of the way because he is in a big rush to get home and make is Kraft dinner.

The Ice Box

As the temperatures rise outside, they are plummeting in my kingdom.  My kingdom consists of the basement of your house.  I have my windowless man cave in the basement.  The TV is also located in the basement and since Jen really doesn't watch much TV, I claim it as part of my kingdom.

During the winter when the furnace was on almost all the time, my kingdom was usually at a bearable if not comfortable temperature.  However, we have had some sunny days with temperatures around freezing lately.  This means that the upstairs gets nice and toasty warm.  Unfortunately, the thermostat is located in that same toasty region of the house.  That means that the furnace rarely comes on during the day.  My kingdom is suffering from a heat embargo by the upstairs.

On Sunday I was downstairs watching a hockey game and it was a nipply 13.5 degrees.  I had not one, but two fleece blankets pulled up to my chin, which was about where my testicles (testes?) were.  I had the hood on my hoody over my head and I had a very cold nose.  The Hawks won, so it was not in vain, but I have to say that one thinks twice before one makes a move to go downstairs to watch any TV program.

Alas, the solution is a few years away when we can afford to renovate the basement and put some insulation and an electric fireplace down there.  Until then, I'll have to keep the longjohns ready, especially with the playoffs just around the corner.

Wiener Deep

It's March.  Why am I still wiener deep in snow?

Well, the first day of Spring was yesterday.  That is remarkable because of the snow that started yesterday and has not stopped as of the writing of this post which is 7:00 pm the next day.  I have already shoveled the driveway once and I am expecting to do it again tomorrow. 

This is our fourth year up in the Northern Wilds.  There is more snow out there this year than in any previous year that we experienced.  This winter has quite frankly sucked the big banana.  It was bitterly cold for the majority of the winter with only very brief periods of non-extremity threatening cold.  There has been mountains of snow.  The first year I actually have a driveway to shovel, I have shoveled non-stop.  I truly understand the say about rain versus snow, "At least you don't have to shovel it!"  Amen.

There's another foot on there from today's snowfall.

I sit here now looking at the mountains of snow in my yard and wondering how long it will take to melt (assuming it ever gets warm enough to melt).  I wonder at the amount of water that will be produced when all that white nastiness disappears.  I wonder if it will go into the my basement.  I wonder how I will deal with the 6 foot high pile of snow that marks the border of my property and the road.  I think it will be ready to snow again before that behemoth is at a manageable size.

Above all else, I wonder when will spring come?

Rural Hockey Tournament

Every year the rural hockey season ends with a two day tournament in Fort St. John.  This event is a big deal for the kids.  They get to play their games at the Pomeroy Sports Centre and they get prizes.  For the kids that live further out in Prespatou and Buick they often get to stay overnight in a hotel as well.  That is a big deal for a kid from the sticks.

Upper Pine was supposed to have their ski trip yesterday and the school would have been pretty empty.  As such, I requested that our games get played all on Thursday.  This way, our school would not have to pay for a substitute teacher.  I am the only coach that is a teacher, so this seemed like an easy way to solve the problem.  Mother Nature likes to have her fun, however and did so yesterday as well.  The temperature at the hill (and in town) was -19 without the windchill.  It was closer to -30 with the windchill.  Thus the ski trip was canceled.  Luckily, Mrs. Holland, my principal called in a sub for me and I was able to be at the tournament with the kids.  Props to Mrs. Holland.

We played three games yesterday, all about an hour apart.  My team played really hard and had a lot of fun.  Our results were unfortunate.  We scored a total of three goals over three games and we had about 30 goals against.  The scores were not unexpected, but a little sad all the same.

However, nearly every player on my team has shown improvement over the course of the season.  The team has practiced hard throughout the season.  It was gratifying to watch kids that could barely stand on skates at the beginning of the season zip around during the games.  Oh sure, they still wiped out a shockingly consistent basis, but that is too be expected.  Rome wasn't built in a day.

In addition, at the end of the day, nearly every parent came up to me, shook my hand and told me that they appreciated the work I had done and that their kids had a great time.  Most of the kids came and thanked me too!  Often, just knowing your efforts are appreciated is often enough of a reward.

So, that's it for rural hockey until next year.  I'm glad it's done, and I'll probably complain next year when I'm freezing my cheeks off at some outdoor rink, but it was worth it in the end.

Gadget Man

I saved up my pennies and this week and took the plunge and bought a Kobo ereader.  I'm not sure why the urge struck me.  I think it was seeing our overly full book case and the price of new books.  The final straw was not wanting to go down to the library when it was -40 out.

Jen and I give ourselves $100 of money each to spend on whatever we want.  That money usually goes towards our respective hobbies.  However, I have managed to build up a bit of a cache of cash due to my skin flint ways.  So, I got it in my head that I wanted an ereader.

Originally, I had considered saving for an iPad.  After playing with one at Best Buy, I dropped that idea.  Not that the iPad was crap, but that it was too expensive for what it was; a glorified ereader and web browser.  So, I began my quest for an ereader.  I did all of my due diligence by researching what is out there and what is best at what.  It turns out that the Barnes & Noble Nook seems to be the best ereader out there.  Unfortunately, it is a journey through hell to get one into Canada and then get the books for it.  I went for second best and got the Kobo.

The Kobo and it's software are dead easy to learn.  I've got it all synced up and hooked up to the internet and my account so I can buy books anywhere (in the house).

So far, I've only read the operating manual on it because I'm in the middle of an old fashioned paper book that I had previously purchased.  Jen is disgusted that I haven't been reading on it yet, but that will come.  The biggest danger is having my wife take it over.  She already has four books she wants to put on it! 

Now where should I hide it...?

Random Hockey Thoughts

This past Saturday I took the team to another rural tournament that was held at..., yep Buick Arena.  I can't believe I keep driving out to the sticks where I lived for two years and moved into town to escape.  Life is funny that way.

Anyway, the players on my team were showing a lack of motivation in wanting to acquire the puck from the other team.  So, I dipped into my coach's bag of inspirational comments and pulled out a gem.  I told the kids that they had to want the puck badly.  I told them to pretend that they were starving and the puck was a pork chop.  I know, I know.  Regardless, the was a moment of quiet on the bench and then I hear a little voice say, "I like pork chops.  They're my favourite food."  This led on to a bit of a conversation on the bench about how good pork chops were.  Clearly, this was not one of my highlights of coaching.

On a similar, but completely different note, I had a weird situation at my hockey game the next day.  I was in the shower and had just finished rinsing off.  The fellow at the shower next to me had just finished as well.  I was following him to the exit.  That was when he stopped to talk to the guy in the shower next to the exit.

The problem was that the fellow had stopped right in the middle of the exit.  I quickly sized up the space left between that fellow's butt and the edge of the door frame.  That was a no go.  So, I was there I stood soaking wet and getting colder by the minute.  Females will ask why I didn't just go around.  I had to think about that too.  I knew I wasn't going to squeeze by, but only on a gut level.  Later while thinking about it, I realized that  it is against the guy code to let any part of your naked body touch another guy's naked body.  I did not want to be the guy to cross that line.  The guy code is unwritten and we never talk about it, but it is rigid and every guy knows it.  Only a few social retards don't and that's a very big reason they are social outcasts and pushed to the edge of the herd for the predators to take first.

So, there are my random hockey thoughts.

Leviathan by Scott Westerfeld

I picked up this book after hearing some good things about it on The D6 Generation podcast.  They really didn't give much detail on the story, so I really didn't know much about it, other than it was young adult fiction and good.

The story is an alternate history set at the beginning of the First World War.  In the world of Leviathan, the great powers of Europe are divided into two large factions: the Clankers and the Darwinists.  The Clankers rely on machinery and mechanical means far beyond what our world had at the turn of the 20th century.  The Darwinists rely on genetically engineered animals to provide transportation, do work and provide power.

The story follows young Deryn Sharp who is a girl disguising herself as a boy in order to join the Royal Aircorp and fulfill her dream of flying.  The other protagonist is Aleksander, the son of the recently assassinated Archduke Franz Ferdinand.  The German military is seeking Alek to remove the only living heir to the Austria Hungarian Empire.  The two characters meet up on the living airship, Leviathan.

While this book is classified young adult, it is in the same class as the Harry Potter series.  The world Westerfeld creates is deep and is as much a part of the story as the plight of the main characters.  All of the machines and genetically altered beasties was fascinating to me.

The story is a nice romp.  It moves along quickly with enough action to keep it interesting, but also enough character development to make it a good story.

A really nice feature of this book is the wealth of black and white drawings included in it.  The drawings add a sense of the era the story takes place in.  The pictures are also quite amazing in their own right.  A nice touch.  More books should have pictures.  Sorry, for the primary teacher moment.

This book is intended for young adults, so there are not any really adult themes and it doesn't go too deep.  Frankly, it is a nice read for a cold winter day when you just want to have fun reading a book and not feel emotionally drained at the end.  I am looking forward to reading the sequel Behemoth.